The Seven Kingdoms (6)
The Fourth Kingdom - Part II
Reading time: 12 minutes
Illustration: AlanFrijns
“Are you ready now to join me for that nectar?”
“P-p-please?” Andy’s involuntary vibrato annoyed him.
The fruit-and-nectar-table from the museum stood on a little knoll in a lush meadow. Hilly grasslands with little groups of birch trees were seen towards the east and south. Brightly coloured flowerbeds made their way west while a large rock formation going straight up emerged from the ground to the north. A gentle breeze gave the scene a rather comfortable air. Andy looked around in amazement.
“Where are we? How did we get here?”
“Where do you think we are?” the lady asked amusingly while gently sipping her nectar. Then, seeing the bewilderment on his face, she continued.
“What you are experiencing now is not something new. In fact, you have jumped from situation to situation and from scene to scene so many times in your life, that you can’t possibly remember them all. Now, in what circumstances do you do that, and effortlessly, I might add?”
An old fashioned lightbulb over his head turned on.
“Am I dreaming?”
“Close, but not exactly. Let’s return for a moment to your request to go back to your place of work. Why did you want to return to an environment that made you feel imprisoned, and was the very reason for you to go on this journey?”
Andy needed a few moments to think about that one. Admittedly, even though the urge had arisen out of frustration, that was rather odd. What had made him actually want to go back to that dreadful office? Moreover, how did she know about his feelings and current journey? He decided to start with answering her question first.
“I think it was anxiety.”
“Anxiety, what for?”
“Well, ever since going on this journey the strangest and scariest things just keep on happening. It’s endless! I don’t like surprises as it is, and this just borders on the ridiculous. I’d had it, and, as crappy as I find my office to be, the sheer predictability of it suddenly became immensely attractive.”
“You’d rather stay imprisoned?”
“I don’t know what’s better: imprisoned and sane, or free and insane.”
“Would you call voluntarily imprisonment sanity?”
Again, he needed some moments to reflect. Because again, that sounded odd. He decided to buy time.
“How do you know about my workplace and journey?”
“Because you have come here. People don’t arrive here by accident. You’ve set out on a path because of a deep longing which arose from a profound dissatisfaction with your life. What are you looking for?”
“Since you seem to know everything about me, you probably know that as well.”
“Yes, but humour me, please.”
“Oh, all right. I’m looking for the meaning of life.”
“Who’s life?”
“What?”
“Who’s life? The phrase ‘the meaning of life’ is always in the eye of the beholder. What is meaningful for one doesn’t have to be for another, like Manipura told you earlier. Specifying your question will help you on your journey, because that way all the situations and sensations you still have to face at least make sense. So, the meaning of who’s life are you looking for?”
Funnily enough, that did not sound odd at all.
“Well, when you put it like that, I’m looking for the meaning of my life.”
“Yes, that’s the starting point. Now, let’s look at where we are. Do you see the rock formations over there?” as she gazed into the northern direction.
“Yes. What about them?”
“Do you see the large painting in the middle?”
The lines weren’t hard to miss.
“You mean that collection of lines?”
“Yes. Can you make out what it is?”
As much as he tried, all he could see where seemingly independent lines, despite his more than average scores on Rorschach blot tests and love for the visual arts.
“I’m sorry.”
“It is a bull.”
“Really?” He looked again. “Doesn’t look like a bull to me.”
“The painting is not about what a bull looks like, it’s about what a bull is.”
Of course! He had been looking with ordinary everyday eyes, not with artistic eyes. The composition and the lines all told the story of the essence of a bull, which is vigorous, enduring, ferocious, and fertile. The revelation was magical.
“Ah, now you see. Good. Now, how come you didn’t see it at first but you do now?”
“When you said ‘bull’, automatically the image of the creature entered my mind and I began looking for that. But, after you explained the difference between its outer appearance and its essence, the picture became clear.”
“To be able to see the bull requires a certain way of seeing. With ordinary everyday eyes those lines will never be anything more than that. One needs vision in order to see the essence of things, which only becomes visible when something can be seen for what it is.”
Andy took a sip of his nectar.
“My art teacher used to say the essence of a thing can become visible when one studies its nature, its relationships, characteristics, and function.”
“Indeed that can be an effective way to transcend the ordinary everyday utilitarian view, which keeps people bound to the realms you have visited before coming here.”
“What do you mean with bound?”
“What do you think it means to be human? Have you ever thought about that?”
In fact, he had. Many, many times. And every time when doors appeared to be opened through which an answer could be perceived, something happened which shut and bolted them again for some time.
“I’m hoping to find out.” he merely said while gazing at the bull.
“YOU HAVE TO DO BETTER THAN THAT.”
“Wha…wha…”
The position was exactly the same. Leisurely sitting, one leg crossed over the other with a black hoof gently swinging in the air, leaning against the back of the chair while holding the nectar in one hand and a flame shooting trident in the other.
“NICE NECTAR, ISN’T IT?” as the devil took a sip.
“Grbltruchlpwrzltpgy.”
“YOU WANT ANSWERS, EVEN THOUGH YOU KNOW THE MAIN CHARACTERISTIC OF ANSWERS IS THAT THEY ONLY PRODUCE MORE QUESTIONS. ANSWERS HOLD THE ILLUSORY BELIEF THAT ONCE FOUND, THE SEEKER CAN SIT BACK AND RELAX FOR ALL ETERNITY. HAS ANY ANSWER EVER PROVIDED YOU WITH EVERLASTING JOY, BLISS, PEACE, LOVE, OR FREEDOM? STOP DROOLING PLEASE AND ANSWER US.”
Slowly returning to his wits, he clearly noticed the ‘us’.
“Er…no, not everlasting. No. But, er…”
“YES?”
“You said ‘us’?”
“DO NOT STRAY. WHAT HAVE ANSWERS EVER DONE FOR YOU?”
Yes, what indeed had they done for him? The devil was surely right in that they eventually only lead to more questions than one was willing to deal with. But, the feeling of sweet relief when an answer was found, even though it was always short lived, had a persuasively addictive quality to it. It was worse than any other addiction in that it made a person feel temporary invincible (without the help of intoxicants, that is).
“Not so much in the long run.” he had to admit.
“When you stop frantically looking for answers is when your mind opens to receive them. For the mind is what it means to be human, Andy. And now you know us both.”
He had only blinked once. The devil had gone and in exactly his posture had returned the Athena look-a-like. Yet, the sulphurous odour remained.
“We are two parts of the same whole, two sides of the same coin. What you are perceiving here is a visionary experience. Being an artist predestined your mind to see things merely beyond their usefulness. It gave you the ability to see things in their essence, even though you don’t necessarily have to be an artist for that. By means of that ability you’re increasing the faculty of ecological awareness, which is nothing more than seeing the mutual interdependence of, well, everything. Now let’s engage in a little experiment. What is your idea of heaven?”
The city is round. The very core consists of a giant white dome to which are attached, in all wind directions, eight smaller domes. The circle around it shows a lush green city park, with innumerable grassy meadows as picnic areas. Around the park are large, round, organic-looking residential buildings made almost completely of glass-like material. If there is sunshine, it will light up people’s houses in various, ingenious ways. Yet the material is provided with photochromic lenses which can be switched on at will. If the light – or heat – becomes too intense, turning them on makes your house wear instant sunglasses.
When travelling farther to the outside rings, there are outdoor sports facilities, agricultural grounds, forests, and lakes. Everyone is able to find out where his or her unique talents and predispositions lie, and encouraged to develop and cultivate them. The exchange of experiences and ideas reminds one of ancient Alexandria, and the total development of every human being is a collective end and undertaking. People in bedsheets debate in the streets or engage in sports, artistic endeavours or organisational projects. Dogs bark playfully in the parks where newly met couples share stories and quaff bottles of wine.
Andy looked around in this marvellous world. There was abundance of everything; colours, music, creativity, magic, love – yes, there was true Love in this world. A feeling of belonging that he’d been craving for as long as he could remember. He had never felt so light, as if he was floating. Which, of course, he was, but he wasn’t going to let that spoil the moment.
“AND WHAT IS YOUR IDEA OF HELL?”
The city is mostly burnt down. A giant crater of about eight miles in diameter is the new downtown. Whatever buildings are still standing have become glassless carcasses. Stray dogs, cats, rats, and the undead are their main occupants. The undead being human bodies still standing and moving about, but who’s soul has left them. They feed on anything that moves, provided it has a soul. You can almost say that a hint of dignity has survived in them.
What remains of the human race has fled to what used to be the suburbs. There people are fighting for basic utilities like food and clothing. Police use military force in a frantic effort to regain order. Various attempts by healthcare providers to treat the sick and injured are met with distrust and resentment, sometimes even physical violence. Incessant military aircraft activity keeps the city in a state of perpetual anxiety. Andy shivered and his body felt like an anvil.
“He has a healthy zest for life, doesn’t he?”
“YES.”
Back on the little knoll, Andy had to hold on to his chair so as to not fall over.
“How can you both say I have a zest for life if we just witnessed the apocalypse?”
“Let me explain something about this realm. This realm, Andy, shows you the totality of what it means to be human. For to be human is to understand, with every fibre of your whole being and without any shadow of a doubt, that life consists of both the good and the evil, the right and the wrong, heaven and hell. Moreover, these opposites continuously change into each other, much like the crest of a wave turns into its trough, which turns again into its crest, always and forever.
“When people grow up, they are being promised that matters like food, sex, power, or possessions, bring everlasting satisfaction as soon as they are acquired. Is that also your experience?”
“Hah.”
“See, so as soon as the fleetingness of life becomes obvious, and everything people thought was valuable turns out to be worthless…”
“… they go out and try to find meaning somewhere else.” Andy to his surprise spoke out loud.
“HE’S CATCHING ON.”
“Hush dear. Now-ouch! Hey, watch where you put that trident.”
“DON’T HUSH DEAR ME.”
“Hm.” and with a much sweeter tone of voice: “Now, Andy, let’s return to the idea of fleetingness. Do you understand the crests and troughs of waves changing into one another?”
Trying to withhold a giggle, he answered:
“Hmm-m.”
“Can you give examples of other beings changing into something else?”
“Ah, well, living beings, when they die, can change into food or soil.”
“Yes, and what can soil change into for instance?”
“Um, trees, plants, flowers, homes for animals, wine cellars.”
“Exactly. And when looking at yourself, you continuously take oxygen, food and water from the outside world, which then transforms into you, and then into carbon dioxide, urine and excrement, which you continuously return back to the outside world. So, in the physical world, which most people call the ‘real’ world, everything is constantly changing and in flux. Nothing stays the same, which becomes a real problem for those who refuse to stop believing in the illusion that goods and experiences bring everlasting satisfaction. On the other hand, it can become a gateway to developing into a complete human being.”
“How so?”
“Besides carbon dioxide, urine, and excrements, what else do humans incessantly give to their outside world that animals generally don’t?”
“I dunno. Words?”
“Yes, insomuch as they form ideas. Your earlier visions of heaven and hell are visions because they imagine a certain situation which has not yet materialized, otherwise it would have been a memory. The human mind can imagine, can think about thinking, reflect upon its own thoughts, feelings, and actions. That’s what distinguishes people from other lifeforms.
“But, people who are bound to the illusion that everlasting satisfaction lies in goods or experiences, which are evanescent by nature, will never realise their full human potential. They use their minds exclusively for acquiring ever new goods and experiences or making sure they don’t lose out on anything, as you witnessed in the earlier realms. Their only measurement of value lies in the usefulness of goods, experiences, or other people. And with the idea of usefulness comes the idea that they, like everything else, are a completely independent entity, having to live their life completely independently from others and their environment. As that is obviously impossible, most of the time their state of being hovers between frustration and anxiety.”
“Yeah, I know that feeling.”
“Yes, but their experience stops with the acceptance of ‘this is as good as it gets.’ Your visions however tell a different story. In this realm, the words heaven and hell become as visible as the so-called real world is to most. The reason why we see your zest for life is because even your vision of hell contained soul, and soul always promises the possibility for development and cultivation of life, even when surrounded by death. Yet, there are people who go through visionary experiences where soul is completely lacking. In their version of heaven, the summer sunlight is malignant, genuine beauty is merely suggestive, and when the intensity of existence which animates every object is seen at close range, and out of its utilitarian context, it’s felt as a menace. Moreover, their version of hell is to be bound forever in a vast cosmic mechanism which exists only to grind out guilt, punishment, solitude and unreality. And yet, they frantically hold on to what they think they have, whatever – or whoever – that may be, out of a continuous anxiety towards letting go.
“Their anxiety is what we call a state of being. Every independent experience, whether pleasurable or painful, has the sauce of anxiety poured over it, so to speak. In most cases, people are not consciously aware of their state of being. It is repressed to a far, faraway place in the depths of their unconscious. As long as it stays there, they will be one-sided in their opinions and predictable in their behaviour. This is, for instance, what your whole advertisement-model is based on.”
“Hells Bells!” Andy sat instantly upright, for he used to love those old retro posters for marine, rail, and air travel.
“The aim in human development is to change one’s state of being, one’s basic perception from which every experience is perceived; changing the sauce, as it were. Until you die, you will experience both painful and pleasurable moments. But, it makes quite a difference if those experiences are poured over with sauce of anxiety or the sauce of joy. However, this is not something which can be learned through books or education, but you at least made a step into the right direction.”
“Me? How so?”
“You made the choice to go on a journey to see if there is anything more to life, which led you here. It’s exactly the ability to make conscious choices which makes every human life so precious. You have in fact made the choice people have been taught to fear since the dawn of time.”
“What’s that?”
“You stepped into the unknown.”
What else does the unknown hold for Andy? Will he succeed in his quest? You can read it in part 7 of The Seven Kingdoms (not yet published).
Jolly greetings,
Erik Stout
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